chastity

All posts tagged chastity

So, time to come clean.

I had done really well through the first part of the year, but lately I’ve fallen off the wagon a bit. I’ve cheated a few times and been jerking off (yes, all the way) more than I should.

There was an incident right before pride where I was checking out this really hot guy on xtube by the name of sabulum and just couldn’t keep it in any more. Especially with this video:

Something about how nervous he seems, but still goes through with what his dick is telling him to do, talking himself through it, and showing everything in the process, is really really hot. Even better that he’s so damn cute, and in that video locked in chastity too. Can’t help but wonder what the story there is. The videos of him leaving his apartment building buck naked also really got me off.

So, including my “bonus” cumshot, that would be my 8th load of the year.

Except, well, I did have a couple weaker moments earlier in the year, because of the problem I described in this post. These were always right after another cumshot, though, so really all part of the same event. So really when I say eight times cumming so far, I really mean that I’ve cum on 8 different days. And only 8 different days. For my own sanity I think I have to give myself a few hours grace period like that—which, for the record, I’ve only made use of twice, and still try to avoid—to keep up with the spirit of this whole challenge of going as long as possible between each orgasm.

Anyway, that happened back on June 24th, but here we are in July. There were a couple more times this week, once two days ago and once tonight, where I really have no excuse other than just jerking off to porn only and not having the self control I needed. So, those are shots 9 and 10. Without really any explanation. Totally a waste! Though it felt good at the moment I know it would be been so much more fun to save them up.

As part of all this, I revamped the Stats page a bit, so that I now have a table of each individual day that I’ve shot a load, plus how long it had been since the last one, and a link to the post where I describe what happened. I think this setup will be easier for me to keep up to date, which means it’ll keep me honest!

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After just over three days, I had to unlock my chastity cage and give myself a bit of freedom. I woke up with a bit of pain in one spot and thought it was a bit of pinching or something. Later on in the day, though, my skin started to feel pretty raw around the bottom of the base ring, and I figured there was a bit too much friction going on.

With the cage itself off, I can move the cockring a lot easier and was able to move it off the part that was chaffing. (Normally the weight of the cage makes it pull downward more than a cockring alone would.) Unfortunately, as soon as my cock felt freedom it started to get hard, and so the ring itself wasn’t coming off any time soon! Of course, I couldn’t help taking some time to re-familiarize myself with what jerking off feels like.

I'm free!

It’s a good thing I kept a spare key for this kind of situation, but I hope as the year progresses I get used to it and learn whatever tricks are necessary to prevent this kind of thing. Though even if I have to take it off every couple days, it’ll still be a big help in making sure I don’t bust my load earlier than I’m supposed to. The temptation is too much!

In the meantime, to distract myself from all of that, I tried updating my stats page, and found this weird thing going on. Can any PHP wizards tell me why

date("Y-M-d", mktime(8, 30, 0, 01, 05, 2014));

prints “2014-Jan-05”, but

echo date("Y-M-d", mktime(11, 45, 0, 01, 08, 2014));

prints “2013-Dec-31”?

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For the entire calendar year of 2014, I am only allowed to cum 12 times. Once per month.

Basically the idea is this: not cumming means I stay horny, and being horny makes me more submissive, more obedient, more in tune with what turns me on, more willing to act on my desires, and makes it way more fulfilling. Despite being an exhibitionist, I’m surprisingly reserved, and encouraging myself to be more open, honest, and active sexually is a major life process for me. A lot of my kinks and fantasies will be laid bare on this site I’m sure. Pun not intended.

The idea came about while talking about my friend Hawk about chastity. I’ve always liked edging, or jerking off for a really long time to build up a bigger orgasm. In November, almost on a whim, I stopped jacking off to see what it was like. I promised Hawk that I wouldn’t cum until he let me. At first it was just going to be a week (already longer than I’d ever gone without jacking off since the first time I had done it) but our schedules just didn’t line up, and it was three weeks before we finally got together. He gave me one of the most intense orgasms I’ve ever had that night.

Having promised to Hawk that I wouldn’t jack off was the only reason I was actually able to do it. I like to commit. The specific idea of only cumming once a month was originally just a hot idea spoken on a hormone high—the thought of how horny and submissive and willing I’d be at the end of each month—but I want to commit to it. Make it real. Make it official. Lock my cock up. (This isn’t a challenge to stay locked all year, but I know from experience how tempting it can be to cheat, so I’ll take any help I can get.)

I’m keeping this blog to keep me on track, and to encourage those ideals of openness and honesty about my sexual side, to stop segregating my sexual and non-sexual lives (in the same way that I’ve been doing with my twitter and tumblr accounts). I won’t describe every sexual encounter or fantasy I have, but I will describe a lot. I’m also going to keep stats on my progress including how long I’ve gone without cumming, how long I’ve been locked in chastity, and how many times I’ve cum so far. Encouragement from supporters will be appreciated I’m sure.

I’ve already cum twice this year (posts coming soon), so I’m starting at a disadvantage. I only get to cum ten more times before New Year’s 2015 (and that’s “cum”, not “orgasm”, as Hawk was quick to point out). Hawk has suggested I might be able to earn extra cumshots by doing particularly daring or ambitious things, but we both agree that those should be very hard, such that I only get one or two extra shots all year (“14 cumshots in 2014” has a nice ring to it) if any at all. More likely, Hawk will be pushing me all year to achieve all kinds of new heights so that each month my cumshot is really well earned. All of those challenges and their rewards will be documented here.

As a final note, though I’m writing this on January 5th, I’m back dating this post to January 1st since that’s when the challenge officially started. Generally posts will be dated to coincide with the date they describe, so that when I look back on this the chronology will be correct (i.e., how much time passed between any two events).

Now on to the fun!

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