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All posts for the month March, 2014

So, turns out edging for about four days is not a good plan when you’re trying not to cum.

One thing that has been really amazing about cutting back on how often I jerk off is that when I do, I can get a lot harder and stay harder with much a much subtler touch than I normally do. Something that I wasn’t able to do as well before was just rub my fingers over the corona (the flared out part at the base of the head), lubbed up with precum, and feel myself right on the edge. I mean I’ve always done something like that, but the sensations are way more intense when I’m that hard and, I suppose, because I get it much more rarely.

I did plenty of edging since January and always managed to hold off, but I think once you add the fact that I had just cum the previous week for the first time in 78 days, my body remembered what it was like and really, really wanted to do it again.

So, short story is that my will-power went completely out the window. I guess we’ll call that #4. When I say completely out the window I really mean it, so I’m definitely cheating a bit here, but given that whatever happened was all part of a single binge, I think I’m still in the spirit of things. Maybe. I’m going to tell myself that at least.

Number of times cumming in 2014: 4 (only 8 left!)
Time without cumming: 0 days, 0 hours
Longest time without cumming: 78 days, 1 hours
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I was chatting with a guy on Grindr tonight who suggested I meet up with him for a workout date at a nearby gym, including some time in the sauna after. This guy was really hot—dark and scruffy type—and seemed to want more than just a hookup, so I decided to meet him and give it a shot.

This gym has a reputation for being even cruisier than the one I normally frequent, and during my workout I could see why; the scenery was sure top-notch! We actually did do a bit of a workout and chatted on and off while we did our separate things, until we decided to wrap it up and go in for a steam.

I wanted to have a quick rinse before going into the sauna. This guy was ballsy enough to follow me right into the private stall, not giving a damn for who might see, which was really exciting. Usually that’s a bit beyond my comfort zone (I like to keep my exhibitionism to audiences that I know are willing, and the standard locker room crowd usually doesn’t fall under that category) but this guy was hot enough and the gym cruisy enough that I had to let him.

The sauna itself was much much smaller than at my usual gym, only seating three. There was a young black guy in there already, so we sat beside him. Almost right away I got the sense that the black guy would fall into the “willing” category, but equally quickly an older guy came in who did not. Older guy stood against the wall facing perpendicular to the bench with the three of us on it; black guy to my left, hot guy I came with to my right. The black guy was pretty obviously playing with himself and getting hard, I think knowing that he was outside the older guy’s peripheral vision. Maybe I’m just more conservative but I didn’t think I was safe, so I just watched a bit out of the corner of my eye.

He wasn’t the guy I came here for anyway. My guy wasn’t into the other, so we took a break and tried out the steam room. This was much larger, and empty. I wasn’t very hot and steamy in there (yet) so popular generally not as popular as the sauna despite the space. Immediately the guy and I start making out, before even sitting down. He steps up onto the first bench, drops his towel, and lets me start sucking him off.

He sits on the top bench along one side near the corner and I take a spot on the next level down 90 degrees to him, so his cock is at eye level. He leans down and starts making out with me, and I’m rubbing his chest and legs, taking it all in. When I go to suck him off, he doesn’t let me get my hands on it, just my mouth. The way he shoved my hand aside each time was a really subtle way of putting me in my place that I really got off on.

After a few minutes we hear someone coming in, so I pull off, and he stumbles a bit pretending like nothing is going on. I’m sure we wouldn’t have fooled nobody, but it was the same black guy from the sauna anyway. I look over to my guy to see if he’s ok with continuing. I get a nod and an eyebrow raise, so I move back to sucking him off with the new guy watching.

Now I’m getting really turned on, sucking off this guy in the steam room with an audience. Soon his hands are on me too, jerking me off as I keep sucking. Eventually I pulled his hand off, which I think he may have taken as a sign that I just wanted him to watch, when really it was just because I was getting too close.

Then my guy leaned back over towards me and started reaching between my legs. In our original Grindr conversation he said he wanted to fuck me in the sauna, and even though I had said I probably wouldn’t be up for that the first time meeting him, I opened up a bit and let him get access to start fingering me.

I wanted to either stand up or move to the upper bench and raise my legs for him, but as he’s pushing his fingers into me we hear some of the staff in the locker room, and realize that they’re telling people the gym is about 10 minutes from closing. Part of me was thinking that means we need to step it up a notch and get ourselves off before they close, while the other (more practical) part realized that it was only a matter of minutes before someone checked to see if there was anybody still in the steam room.

Listening to that latter part, we got ourselves together and went to the showers. I went to the far end of the two rows of shower stalls to an empty one and again the guy I’m with follows me in and shuts the door. Fuck, this guy has balls! We start making out, and then he spins me around, bends down, and starts rimming me. This guy, I thought, is probably going to fuck me, right here, right now.

As hot as that sounded to me, and as much as I want to do something like that, I pulled him up and said I didn’t want anybody to see that there were two people in here.

“Nobody cares,” he said.

“Still…”

Maybe that was a pussy move. I won’t lie and say I wonder what might have happened if I didn’t stop things when I did. He went to his own stall after that, and the rest of the locker room experience was pretty much normal. With more making out and light jerking off, but mostly normal. I’m hoping we can workout again together soon!

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As of last Thursday it had been 78 days since I had last cum. I was starting to worry that the bar was being raised too high by letting it go so long, and was thinking about just releasing the pressure the old fashioned way. I could worry about doing something more memorable next round. On Wednesday, though, Hawk suggested something worth waiting for: a really cute friend of ours had arranged to get fucked by at least a couple guys in the backroom of the Black Eagle during Naked Night. This I wanted to see, and I wanted to be horny for it to appreciate every moment.

Being an exhibitionist, and part-time nudist (when the mood strikes), I love naked night. I love just hanging with people with nothing hiding and everything out in the open. I’d enjoy it even if there wasn’t a back room element, as that side of it usually isn’t very noteworthy anyway. Often it’s just a dozen or so guys around the edges of the room waiting for something to happen. This week it was quite full, though, with lots of blowjobs and jerking off.

When I first got there I found Hawk and his boyfriend in the back just standing around having a chat, though sex was in the air and all around us. They had been there a bit already, and I wasn’t really ready to jump right in, so I moved back out into the main bar to say hi to a few friends of mind I had run into on the way in.

Of course, I didn’t want to miss anything fun that was going on in the back, so made my way back eventually. This cute friend of ours claims that, despite the rumours, there wasn’t actually any planned rendezvous, so I might not be getting the show I was hoping for. As he, Hawk, and I were chatting though, this big hunk of a guy walked up to him and just said “Suck me off”. It was so hot to hear him just say “ok” and get down on his knees. I had no idea who this guy was but just seeing him take control like, and seeing this friend submit, was really hot.

There was a lot going on throughout the night, and I won’t describe all of it, but I enjoyed taking it all in. I didn’t, however, participate in much. I didn’t want to blow my load on some random blowjob. I came very very close, though, watching that friend—the one who claimed the rumours of him getting fucked that night weren’t true—get bent over a table in the center of the bar while another guy rammed in to the hilt. Fuck, the moans he was making as he was getting pounded, with the whole bar around him watching, made me rock hard. Hawk slide up behind me and that was it—between Hawk’s cock up against my ass, his hand on my cock, and the visual of these two guys fucking in the open, I was going over the edge.

But no, again, I didn’t want to cum like that either. If Hawk was going to push me over the edge, I wanted to earn it from him and cum when he told me to, not just because I was too close to the edge to handle it. So I backed away for a moment, and literally had to walk off to a corner, close my eyes, and take a few deep breaths to avoid exploding all over the table that guy was getting fucked on. (Thinking back on it, coating his face in it would have been a pretty hot way to go!)

All told I was there maybe a few hours, but that was the closest I came to cumming. After seeing at least a few guys get fucked, getting close to the edge several times, and catching up with some friends in a non-sexual way, I decided to call it a night and head home.

So, if cumming at the bar in front of everybody wasn’t enough, how did I finally blow it?

Just like I said I would — jacking off at home.

78 days of cum

This is what eleven weeks of cum looks like.

Now, of course there’s a lot more to tell about how exactly I jerked off and what pushed me over the edge in the end, but I think I’d already given enough detail for one night :) Suffice to say, it felt damn good, and worth the wait.

Note: I’m back-dating this a couple days as per my policy of keeping things in chronological order. Since I posted an update at the time it happened I’m just dating this back enough to precede a few other sexy encounters I’ll be writing about soon. Written on March 27th.

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I’ve been a little incommunicado lately, but for those of you who live your lives refreshing the stats page, you may notice something new:

Number of times cumming in 2014: 3 (only 9 left!)
Time without cumming: 0 days, 0 hours
Longest time without cumming: 78 days, 1 hours

More detailed posts to come, but it’s late, and I’m going out of town for the weekend, so you’ll have to wait.

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It’s now been over two months.

I want to cum this week.

I think it should happen while I’m getting fucked.

Maybe while guys take turns at me.

Or even while they don’t—I’ve wanted to get double-fucked again for a while.

Maybe try to cum without touching myself, but if that doesn’t work, only after all the guys are done.

And I think it should happen on film.

Now, who wants to help?

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